Passionate Ally Shares Her Story

 

Story by Gary Simpson
photo by Chris Mackenthun

“I don’t know if I’m interesting enough to be in a magazine,” was Jen Potcher’s first response to me asking to write about her. But, she did also say “I’d love to.”

I have known Jen for quite some time now, and can honestly say I’ve never met a more strong and compassionate ally.

Jen, herself is not gay, but she is very closely tied to so many members of our community. This past April, Jen joined the cast of Rent, as chorus member, and as “The Bag Lady, ” which she jokingly admits “was the best part in the show! Plus I got to say F—! ” She also added that playing in Rent was “the best experience of my life. ”

Rent played for five weeks at Stagecoach Theater in Boise. The show was so popular, 3 extra shows were added on to accommodate. Jen also has worked at The Balcony Club since 2010. She began hosting karaoke night Sundays in 2011 .

In 2012, Jen sang the National Anthem to a crowd in front of the Capital Building during the Pride Festival, and in 2013, she opened the Pride Festival at Ann Morrison Park.

More recently, Jen has recently joined as a member of the Imperial Sovereign Gem Court of Idaho – a community organization dedicated to raising money for other local charities and organizations. When asked why she joined this group she was quite simple in her reply, “I have always loved drag queens, and I love to watch them perform. I love that they raise money for the community. ”

During our conversation, I explained to her why I chose to interview her. I told her that I’ve watched her in what she does for the community, know she’s heavily involved with a number of activities, and I always see her stand up for other people in the community, especially when there’s unnecessary discord between fellow members of the community.

“I’ve always felt drawn to the LGBT Community, ” she said. “When I was younger, I was picked on, and made fun of, and I can really relate to what [they] have been through. ”

We discussed the changes that have happened throughout our community, with the dissolution of Boise Pride Inc, and the birth of Boise Pridefest.

When asked about what she would like to see change in our community, Jen was very candid with her response, “I would like to see people have more respect for each other, and for people to be more careful. We can’t win the fight by tearing each other apart from the inside. ”
More recently, Jen has posted to Facebook a heartfelt story that explains her dedication even more:
“People often ask me why it’s important to me to be an ally and spend so much time fighting for equality and gay rights. I spent a good portion of my life being picked on and ostracized because of who I was. Nothing was sacred…Not the music I listened to or the clothes I wore, not the movies I liked or the books I read, not the things I collected.”

“I was given a beautiful plastic horse from my granny. It was a Clydesdale from Bush Gardens. I was so proud of it, that I took it to school with me and carried it around all day. I’d proudly place it on whatever desk in whatever class I was sitting in.
What followed, I will never understand. From that day on I was mercilessly mocked. I was given the nickname “pony” by several people in my class…Not for a good reason. They mocked me for years with that name. Some of them might be reading this now. It didn’t matter what I did, I never seemed to get out of that stigma of not being one of the “normal” kids. That stuck with me for a long time and for a long time made me afraid to really be myself.
There were a lot of other things about me that people made fun of, but that is one that sticks strong in my memory. I haven’t told that story in years, but I think it’s a small piece of the puzzle as to why I do what I do. I know what it’s like to be picked on and pushed aside because you are different…Because you don’t fit the mold that your peers think you should fit into.
Take it on a much grander scale and put it into every day life…Jobs and family and home and laws…And you have what my beloved LGBT family goes through. No one should ever be persecuted or denied rights for being just who they are…Loving who they love, being who they deep down believe themselves to be.
And that community has accepted me with open arms and even though I am straight, they accept me unconditionally as exactly who am. I don’t have to hide the things that I love, and neither should they. Today and every day, if you are LGBT, stand up and be proud of who you are.
Don’t let anyone make you feel like there is something wrong with you or that you are broken. You are just who and what you are supposed to be. And if you are an ally like me, stand up and be proud!
Don’t let anyone make you afraid to stand up for what’s right. And that’s why I do it. Because it’s right. Because no one stood up for me when I was 12 years old and being picked on and felt so alone. Because if they can be so accepting of me, why can’t the rest of the world be accepting of them? And the last few days prove that we are winning this fight.”
And that, was the exact reason I chose Jen Potcher to interview. Far too often our community spends more time in discord, fighting over nonsense when we should be standing up for each other and treating one another with respect. Thank you, Jen, for being a perfect example of what we should be in our community! I hope others can be as positive and driven as you are!

A Look Ahead

Thank you so much for taking the time to read our magazine!

As we move forward, we plan to give you the most we can every month. This project takes support from our community. Spread the word. Tell your friends, family, and coworkers.

Election Day is November 4th, so be sure to get out and vote, if you haven’t already. We need change in our community, and on our political field. We need candidates that support our fight for equality, and we need to change our discrimination laws to protect us from unnecessary harm.

For our next issue, we hope to bring you an even better issue. Our theme? “Let’s Talk About Sex.”

When talking about sex, we’re not trying to throw it in everyone’s face. We want to talk about the social issues that occur in our community that surround sex. We’re going to discuss safe practices, and STD prevention. We’ll also discuss intimacy, and relationships.

In the days to come, make sure to check out our website for a survey. We want to hear from you.

If you would like to be a part of our project, let us know. Email us at news@outboise.com

 

UPDATE: We chose to go with a holiday theme on our December issue, instead of going with an inappropriate theme. Make sure to check out even more from our debut issue, here:

Our Magazine

Small Town Gay

by Ezikiel Coy

It was almost 16 years ago that I came out to my family. It wasn’t long until the rest of the small town I lived in knew as well, which was challenging in my younger years. While the bullying and homophobia I endured was challenging, I have taken the time to reflect on those experiences and attempt to understand what the silver lining on that dark cloud could be.

I remember my best friend at the time confronting me while I was walking home from work one summer day. We hadn’t spoken in almost a full year since he found out that the small town rumor mill got it right (for once). After a bit of verbal assault, and an attempt to run me over with an ATV, I flew home feeling more isolated and alone than ever.

It was another 4 years from that moment that I had the confidence to make any long term friends; let alone have the self-assuredness to build any lasting romantic relationships. I felt utterly crushed because of the amount of rejection that growing up surrounded by all that negativity instilled in me.

Then, something amazing happened. I realized while speaking with other members of the gay community that my experience wasn’t the only one. Adversity is something that binds us all together. It is a sad fact that many of us share a history of being assaulted, abused,
Degraded, and generally misunderstood for being gay.

We have had corporations like Chick-Fil-A, Hobby Lobby, and various religious and political groups hurt us with their rhetoric and their defamation. Yet, we are not broken. We have shown the world our solidarity through Pride, the Add the Words campaign. Having local businesses support our causes, and by standing together with friends, allies, family, and each other is so much more important to creating the environment and security that our community needs. This indelible spirit is what guides our community to be open, accepting, and free of bias. It is more important than ever on the new frontiers of our civil rights movement to come together.

Humans are only mortal, and we make mistakes. This was a revelation that I had at the startling age of “young,” when I realized that the homophobia I grew up with in a small town of Idaho was external to me. It made me feel… things. Many of the emotions I was processing at the time I am sure you all have had.

Depression, rejection, outrage, it made me feel singled out, cold, humiliated, and lower than trash. Thanks to a welcoming community with new found sense of self and purpose, my life has turned around in a way that so many young men and women need in order to survive these trying times.

 

 

Need Advice? Ezikiel is also a professional Tarot reader, Spiritual Healer, and Priest, and is OutBoise’s resident Advice columnist.

email him at advice@outboise.com

Boise Gay Men’s Chorus Takes Gay Pride To Eastern Idaho

In September, BGMC represented the treasure valley by performing three outreach concerts as part of Idaho Pride Tour 2014. In late September, Boise, Twin Falls, and Idaho Falls each got a dose of gay pride through song, as the chorus performed music that touched upon serious Idaho LGBT topics as well as comedic songs that received laughter and applause. Each concert was free, with voluntary donations gladly accepted. This was to ensure their voices and message was available to everyone who wanted to listen.

The program consisted of both serious and fun songs. Michael Stear performed Michael’s Letter To Mama beautifully, bringing many people to tears. Marry Us was a song that director Adam Wade Duncan said “we will proudly sing on the Idaho Capital steps soon.” Other comedic pieces like I’m Available and Hello Heterosexuals kept the audience laughing unexpectedly. Ending each concert, the song Color Out of Colorado included “choralography” that displayed coordination and comedy that left everyone in high spirits. Overall, each performance was well received and people were grateful for a visit from the newly formed Boise chorus. “Boise Pride and BGMC successfully brought diversity and more gay pride to Idaho cities that don’t normally have access to these types of performances.” Rodney Busbee, organizer of Boise Pridefest.

 

The mission of the Boise Gay Men’s Chorus is to open hearts and minds through creative expression. The chorus has truly accepted and exemplified this mission, as chorus members financed themselves on tour, as well as volunteered an informational booth at the Idaho Falls Gay Pride Festival. They handed out temporary tattoos, candy, and most importantly talked to people about the chorus. “We want to let everyone know that we are here and growing. BGMC is one of the newest gay men’s choruses in the country and we want to become a leader for LGBT voices in Idaho.” Doug Rinard, chorus member.

Looking forward to the upcoming 2014-2015 season, BGMC has just announced their concert series titled “Light Up Boise”. The Lights of Christmas in December, The Lights of Broadway in March, and The Lights of the Rainbow, featuring “When I Knew” in June. These three concerts are sure to delight and inspire listeners to remember those people in our lives that truly act as a “guiding light”. Newly hired artistic director Adam Wade Duncan promises to bring both a serious reflection through song, as well as offer a whimsical and “tongue in cheek” program that we all have come to love from the gay men’s choral movement. Add Boise Gay Men’s Chorus on Facebook or visit www.boisegaymenschorus.com to see the latest offerings of tickets as well as events held locally!

Aphasia

pain is talking crazy so
how can i hate smoke that hasn’t happened?
because fear gives hallow gifts daily and
i wrote a poem that sometimes cries
–
Gary Bell
11/29/09

All You Need Is Love: A personal look at Marriage Equality

By: Jennifer Palumbo

Most of us have a basic understanding of what the definition of marriage equality or at least what it is supposed to mean. I found a couple of different variations of how marriage is defined, one being “the legally or formally recognized union as partners in a relationship”, and from another “a combination or mixture of two or more elements”.

Wikipedia states marriage is “a socially or ritually recognized union or legal contract between spouses that establishes rights and obligations between them, between them and their children, and between them and their in-laws. The definition of marriage varies according to different cultures, but it is principally an institution in which interpersonal relationships, usually sexual, are acknowledged. In some cultures, marriage is recommended or considered to be compulsory before pursuing any sexual activity. When defined broadly, marriage is considered a cultural universal”.

Equality is defined as “the state of being equal, especially in status, rights, and opportunities. Seems easy enough to understand. What is not so easy, seems to be gathering the masses to consent as to whom equality should be bestowed.

When de-constructing the meanings of each word, there is such cohesiveness between the two that I am baffled anyone could argue this is not only a basic right as an American, but a basic right of all human beings. Oh, how proud I was to watch as my brothers and sisters sang, after being told they would have to wait even longer to legally reveal their commitment to their partners, and all they could do was join their voices in song singing “All you need is Love”.

I wish we lived in a world where that was true. We wouldn’t be fighting in the wars, choosing between whether or not to feed hungry children or providing housing for families in need. If love were all it took, we would be evolved in a way that seems unattainable at the moment. But what we can do is take a look at how far we have come. Just 20 days ago, Idaho could be counted as one of the numerous states listed in the undeniable, constitutional injustice of telling me who I could or could not call my wife.

Now I don’t want to be accused of not looking at both sides of things. Anyone who knows me can tell you I am diligent in finding out as much information as possible to ensure a good conversation can be had.

I listen to people, who have their right to opinion, just as much as we do, say their god, or state constitution, or even popular vote, state a marriage can only exist between a man and a woman. Usually, my first question to them is if they feel love in their own relationship. Next, do they adore their children and want only the best for them.

Do they feel pride in holding the hand of their betrothed in public. How important is it to them to enjoy the liberty of filing joint State and Federal taxes each year. Are they planning to be interned next to their chosen partner for whatever afterlife they believe in.

And lastly, is their love diminished in any way because of someone or group of individuals who might not agree that they are together, whether that is a parent, social demographic, or because their ideals are not traditional. I can tell you, conversations usually last seconds or hours. No matter how you define what is “acceptable”, there are no boundaries when it comes to expressing and receiving love.

Now I have to admit an advantage in these conversations. Most people (not you folks with infallible gay-dar) look at me and assume I am straight. I am not butch, I am not fem, just an average chick. No extra makeup or fancy clothes.

Always been average in most ways. If one were to take the time to spend more than 10 minutes in dialogue, they will realize that I am irrefutably gay. I sport a little rainbow bracelet and will mention my partner within that 10 minute conversation. Not because I need you to know I am gay. Not because I am in this “let’s try it and see if it sticks” phase. It is because I am a proud and loud lesbian and I really don’t have time for your bulls**t if you won’t take the time to listen to mine.

I am here to love and to be loved. I will help you in any way I can. Especially if it is to open your mind to ideas and kindness. I don’t judge you, so don’t you dare judge me. And if your god is telling you to, well mine won’t. So let’s talk when you are ready. OK, I am way off the subject at hand.

I guess what I am getting at by letting you into who I am a bit, is to say that the face of love is ambiguous. Marriage equality isn’t anything but an inevitable step in evolution. Women continue to close the gap in gender inequalities. Race has become a protected right (which our family is fighting the good fight and I have no doubt the Words will be added in the near future). Our planet and her limited resources are being studied like never before.

These things were once thought of as potential ideas that may never come to fruition. And here we are, after less than a month, turning the statistics on their heels and the number of states recognizing the unification of two individuals, legal. Oh, we still have so much work to do. If only for our siblings that reside in states that continue to resist the inevitable.

Their time will come and with love, perseverance, strength, and the knowledge that love endures all things, they too will have one of the most basic human rights bestowed upon them…“the legally or formally recognized union as partners in a relationship and the state of being equal, especially in status, rights, and opportunities’. It really is fact…all you need is love….

The Battle

by James Pipkin

 

People calling, voices screaming.
Dying…

Some men hear them, others stare.
Glassy…

Eyes straining for light.
Darkness…

Ears straining for sound.
Only silence…

Lungs straining for sweet breath.
Smoke…

Limbs straining for movement.
Still…

Another place to go.
So far away…

Run from the death.
Flee…

A hand in the darkness.
Take it…

Successful Retreat

To jump off
thankfully sliverless, old dock
with no regard
for what lies at the bottom
of the lake,
was refreshingly nostalgic
A tinge of fear
that something might
grab my legs and pull
me under
could not stop
child-like rush of adrenaline
to run from one end
and throw myself,
as an organic spear,
breaking tension
while water fills
its container against
my body
enveloped by playful,
soft, warm water
and sealing
me under
with contentment,
to rise with a
long, overdue,
sincere smile.
8/1/09
Gary Bell

Our Debut Issue!

Check out the Debut issue of OutBoise Magazine, here:

 

Insatiability

Nothing like
its source,
no form or semblance
lies within
non-permeable bottle
except its color
of red aflame
attracting all who seek,
begging to remember
salt such as the sea
does hold and provide
to anything desired.
But once dissected,
objectively analyzed,
and signaled from taste buds
to brain,
how odd the message
and information reads.
Why must so much be
dipped, dripped, poured,
finger-licked, and devoured
as though ketchup were
a lavish drink of
Château Neuf de Pâpe.

8/1/09
Gary Bell